Goodbye
by yankees545
Summary: Inspired by a flippant comment Reid made in Proof 7.02 "I had to take care of some stuff with my mom."
1. Chapter 1

_So this is just something that came to my mind earlier today... yesterday? I had to write it out so now it's 3:30 am and this is Unbeta'd. Please let me know if this makes any sense whatsoever! Suggestions and feedback are welcome!_

"Reid... Hey Reid... Kid!" Morgan called to the sleeping agent. Reid jumped a bit at the sudden call.

"Wha- Morgan?" He rubbed his eyes and stretching as far as the SUV seat allowed. They were parked in front of the latest hotel the team was staying at. Hopefully they'd be able to wrap up the case tomorrow, they had a suspect in custody, now all they needed was a confession. They'd finish up tomorrow, no need to interview the UnSub while everyone was half awake. It was 11 o'clock and no one had slept much the last week.

"We're here sleepin' beauty! Unless you want to spend the night in the car..." Morgan joked with his friend who rolled his eyes in response.

"Very fuu-funny." He said trying unsuccessfully to stifle a yawn. Morgan gave a good natured chuckle.

"After this case you really need to get some sleep, man. You look exhausted!" There was an unspoken question in the statment, maybe there was a reason Reid had been half asleep this entire case. But Morgan wasn't going to get his answer tonight, Reid's eyes were almost completely shut again. It was times like this that Morgan had a hard time seeing Reid as a 29 year old FBI agent he was instead of a 9 year old kid, not that he'd ever tell him that.

"C'mon, I'm not carrying you in..." The younger agent forced his eyes open again and opened the SUV door, and the two stepped out into the brisk New York autumn air. A chilly breeze blew through the parking lot.

"I'm awake now!" Reid said sarcastically, supressing a shiver. They walked into the hotel and directly to the elevators. ' You know you've been in one place too long when the night staff know your face...' Morgan thought to himself. It wasn't too long before the pair reached their seperate rooms.

"I'll see ya in the morning, sleep well!" Reid nodded, entering his room digging through his bag to grab his phone.

Morgan entered his room and took his own advice, quickly getting ready for bed. Within 20 minutes, he was sound asleep, comforted by the fact that in they'd be going home the next day if all went well. In the room next door however, Reid wasn't sleeping.

"Dr. Norman...no it's ok, I wasn't sleeping yet." Reid was on the phone, pacing around his room, cursing time zone differences for the 4th time this week. "Is she ok?" The doctor couldn't talk fast enough, Reid needed to know what was wrong tonight. Wait... did he hear that right? "No you... you can't be serious. Can...ahh...can I talk to her? She's resting right now? Ok... Can-Can you call me when she wakes up? Thanks. I'll see what I can do about coming out to visit soon. Thank you, bye." He hung up the phone, closed his eyes and took a deep rattling breath. He sat on the hotel bed, moving on autopilot.

'She can't be dying. She just can't be. What if she's hurting? What if she hurts someone else? What if she hurts herself?' He rested his head on his hands, still clutching his phone.

'What if I don't make it there in time?' A couple tears made their way down his face and his shoulders shook slightly.

'Does she know how much she means to me? Does she remember me? Remember dad?' Memories pushed their way into his mind good and bad, most were decades old...

I needed to visit more often, now there's no more time...what if the letters weren't enough? They probably weren't enough. It's almost too late now...' He let the phone slip through his fingers. His body shivered a couple more times before he moved, again on autopilot. He got ready for bed and laid down on top of the covers. He grabbed his phone and just held it. Held it and waited for it to ring. Waited, dreading the news, but he needed it to ring.

He didn't get much rest, whenever he dosed off he jerked himself awake, not wanting to possibly miss the most important call of his life. Finally about 4:30 he fell into a slightly deeper sleep.

He jolted awake as his cell phone alarm went off at 6:45 a few hours later. He sat bolt upright and answered it before realizing that it was his alarm, not Bennington. The flash of adrenniline faded fast and he slumped over, sitting on the edge of the bed again. He stayed there for a few minutes before pushing himself up to get ready for the rest of the day. If they wrapped things up fast enough maybe he could be in Las Vegas that night...

The team met in the lobby at 7:15, everyone was ready for this case to be over, they all were ready to go home. The group went together over to the local police station. They split to do different tasks that needed to be done. JJ was writting up a statment for the press and for the police department debrief. Hotch and Rossi had gone to conduct the interrigation. Reid, Morgan and Emily began packing up and filing evidence away. Hotch and Rossi surprisingly finished first. They had profiled that once the UnSub was caught that he'd admit quickly to any and all charges but they didn't expect it to be so fast!

However, the little time was enough time for Emily and Morgan to realize that something was deffinety up with Reid. He was moving at such a slow pace. He wasn't talking, there were no tangents or random facts, he barely responded to the small talk Morgan and Emily tried to engage him in. He had his phone in his hand all morning and he jumped everytime a phone rang.

"Who're you waiting to hear from? Who's the lucky lady Reid?" Morgan joked, trying once more to get Reid to talk. Emily rolled her eyes at Morgan's antics.

"It's mom." He said quietly. Emily and Morgan shot him sympathetic looks, but they dropped the subject. They knew he didn't like talking about personal issues but he would come to them if he needed to.

Hotch and Rossi came by mere seconds later they helped finish collecting and organizing the evidence off of the wall and into boxes. Not long after that JJ poked her head in to let them know that she was going to give a final statment to the public and they'd be ready to go. The team collectivly relaxed, except Reid. He went up to Hotch.

"Hotch... I need to talk to you." Morgan shot Reid a concerned look that Hotch intercepted.

"Ok, let's step outside then." Hotch replied, noting the deep circles under his agents eyes and his slack posture. "What is it?" Hotch asked, keeping his voice and words neutral.

"It's ahh... well, you know that my mom... uh sorry. It's just... I need some time. I need to go- need to go home for a little while, if you know, that's ok." Hotch's face slackened slightly with concern.

"Is she ok?" Reid shook his head slightly.

"Are you ok?" Hotch asked concern evident in his voice. Reid looked down at his feet.

"I-" He stopped. He was sure if he kept talking he'd lose it. He didn't want to burst into tears in front of his boss. Instead he nodded. Hotch put a hand on his shoulder.

"We're here for you Reid. If you need anything..." He left the sentence hanging. Reid nodded again.

"Take the time you need and remember that we're just a phone call away." Another nod.

"Thanks Hotch."


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer, I own nothing._

Spencer Reid had been on some long plane rides before, even on plane rides that seemed longer than they should have. The team had always had the occasional case where they couldn't get to their destination fast enough, every second was valuable time. But this plane ride topped them all. It was a five hour flight from NYC to Las Vegas and after saying goodbye to the team he had taken the soonest flight, due to depart in 20 minutes, at 10:30. The wait felt so much longer. Garcia played a part in getting him tickets on this otherwise full flight.

"Attention. Flight 317 to Las Vegas is now boarding. Flight 317. Families with children and anyone with disabilities may begin loading now." The flight attendant said over the loudspeaker. Reid re-checked his boarding pass for the 20th time in the last half hour. Not that he'd forgotten but because it was something to do.

'Boarding Group B, Row 20 Seat A. Boarding Group B, Row 20 Seat A. Boarding Group B, Row 20 Seat A.' He thought over to himself. He began bobbing his leg, pushing his shortened hair behind his ear... not working to well. He grabbed a random travel magazine that was on a nearby table and started flipping through it. Another inadequate distraction...

"Attention. Flight 317 to Las Vegas is now boarding Group A. Flight 317 to Las Vegas." Reid finished the magazine. He checked through his go-bag, making sure he had everything for the fifth time since arriving at the gate. He had a change of clothes, toothbrush, a couple books, envelops, pencils, ID, and his phone. He closed the bag and sat back, closed his eyes and counted; trying to convince himself that it was just his perceptions that were creating the illusion of time going backwards.

'But time itself is just another illusion isn't it? It's a man-made measuring phenomenon. Time only exists because we measure it, calculate it, make it real. It's one dimensional and my counting is never going to be perfectly accurate one 'second' to the next. Why am I bothering to try? Time will always pass, there's nothing we can do to speed it up or slow it down.' He thought, feeling frustrated and anxious as his mind made the connection to other inevitable events… like death… He needed to be with her _now_. He let his leg start bouncing again.

"Attention. Flight 317 to Las Vegas is now boarding Group B. Flight 317 to Las Vegas." He quickly stood, grabbing his bag in one hand, keeping his pass out and got on line to board the plane.

'Please no delays… no delays… no delays… please? ' He repeated in his head as if it would have a tangible effect on reality. Had he believed in a deity he would've prayed.

The rest of the boarding went off without a hitch and soon enough they were taxiing down the run way, departing on time.

As the plane leveled out Reid let out a sigh and felt his breathing ease, just slightly. He wasn't relaxed, his heart was still in his throat and his eyes still stung but at least now he was on his way, going as fast as he could.

He stared out his window, uncharacteristically silent, ignoring his neighbors' attempts at conversation as he got as comfortable as he could to wait out the next 5 hours.

'I'm coming Mom. Don't worry, I'll be there soon. Hang on for me!'

_AN: Sorry for the delay! My computer has been threatening to crash for a couple weeks so I've put off writing updates for this… Probably not the best way to go about doing things… Oh well, here you go, please let me know what you think, constructive criticism and suggestions are highly appreciated! I don't know how much longer I'm going to make this, but I'm thinking 1 or 2 more chapters. On another note, a song I'd suggest listening to is Baby by Blake Shelton if you want to get into the head space I'm putting Reid in._


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